Wow. I knew I was behind on posting, but didn't realize how the days were flying. Been battling the Multiple Sclerosis, coming out of the attack that started on the 2nd and ending on the 11th. Finally getting back to feeling somewhat OK and getting back to work. Then there's the whole concept of being lost about what I was doing before the last attack, and how to pick up the pieces. Tremendously hard, but I'm starting to get it together now, and should be back in the game at 100% on Monday.

Since my last post, we had the IEP meeting for Blueberry. More of the same goofiness. "She's wonderful", "Behaviorally, this is expected with her disability", blahblahblah. My job at these meetings is to be engaged while not showing I'm enraged. The home manager and clinical supervisor from the home were there, lending more outrage as they tried to grandstand. The big news from the IEP meeting was that none of them have a clue about how to address her behaviors. The school mentioned doing a "behavioral assessment", but nothing was documented so it won't happen. The home is determined that Prozac is the answer to all problems. Funny, but the tight boundaries and "time-out" behavior mods that Wifey used here work just fine for her. We've told them and told them, but because we're not "trained professionals", our successes don't exist. And Blueberry suffers because its "inclusive" care by their definition - which means they're going to do whatever the hell they want. And don't disagree or you're the bad guy. Bah!!!

Honestly, I think the emotional rage I felt for the Home and IEP meetings (can you believe I was a Marine?) was the trigger for the latest attack. Not funny either, it knocked me down for around 10 days. On the bad side, I've got to make sure that I build some kind of mental vent for the emotion so I don't end up triggering another attack. The good news is that there won't be another meeting until December. So I should be able to make progress between now and then.

There's good news in all of this. Finally figured out how to configure the products in the store. The publishing product's sales are doing reasonably well. Stumbled onto a project that should be fairly easy to complete, should lead to some short term revenue and have the ability to branch out for distributable sales. Market is in the "used household articles" sector, so I think it has a chance of driving sales in the economy that's coming. Should be interesting.

Everything else is great. Been having trouble with ear wax. Wifey got me this torture chamber device that cleans them out. Tried it once - better than hitting your thumb with a hammer!

Oh, and Razor's moved from nagging about the Scooter to nagging about a laptop! Buy Buy Buy!!! Life here is never dull. More to follow.

One of the things that this blog can do for me is act as a place I can record my MS "attacks". That's what I'll choose to call them. Some of my symptoms will flare up, making my life miserable for a while. Like I've said in previous posts, the physical symptoms slow me down and bother me, but what really scares me is slipping into that mental mode I was in right before I was diagnosed - short attention span, loss of short-term memory and physical / mental exhaustion.

Went to the Skuz meeting on Friday. More of the same, with no resolution to anything. They were focused on getting the signature on the permission chit for changing Blueberry's meds to Prozac. I was focused on getting pipelines built from their side so there was information flow from them to us, using the argument that we couldn't sign the med permission unless we had the information they took to the doctor, and the writeup of what the doctor was recommending. Was mildly effective at it, but still haven't received anything. Anyway, the meeting was moderately stressful for me, and I crashed about 2 hours after I got home. Exhaustion, upper back pain. No energy at all. Spent the afternoon in the reclining chair. Funny, there was very little shakiness though.

I guess the "trigger" was the stress of the meeting. Didn't feel overly stressful though. I wasn't emotional in the meeting. I stayed on the "big arrow" stuff. However, I was dreading going. Had some concerns that I'd represent myself and Wifey to both our satisfaction.

Saturday started OK, but as the day wore on I felt the same symptoms. Usually, an "attack" lasts a max of 48 hours. Still feeling the same things today though. Again, back pain, loss of energy, very little shakiness. A bit of eye chatter in the morning. A new revelation came from looking at the light tube in the HP scanner. When I looked away the white light split into white, red and green. With perfectly spaced bars. Never experienced that before, even when the symptoms were at their height before the steroid treatment.

I'm a big believer in working with what I have though. The problem right now is figuring out whether what I have will be good enough. I figure I have a year today now to figure it out, then I have to start seriously think about filing for disability or trying to get a light duty job. From what I see in the economy, I'm thinking that it will probably be the former, as there won't be any jobs to be had.

So that's the update on my MS stuff. I'll try to mention it in a post when I see the current symptoms going away.